The Awakening of Russell Henderson

Every Sunday, I try to post an excerpt from my novel, The Awakening of Russell Henderson. Here’s another. The book is available at

I told her of all my doubts, about all the old stuff she had already heard . . . too many times. Hanna listened, twirling her strand of hair like always, but there was no sexiness in it tonight. Her look was bewildered and cold.

Abruptly, she stood up,  and faced me, “Russell, we’ve been through this shit before. I know this is hard for you. I have no idea what more I can do to help. I really don’t. I’m really tired of your pathetic, self-pitying, poor-me bullshit.” Her voice and anger were rising. “I’m sick of it. Maybe you should go back and spend your fucking life trying to please mommy and daddy. I’m starting to think you deserve each other. Go back to fucking Chicago. Wallow in your own shit. I am so tired of listening to you whine! Get help! You need to get over your fucking mommy-daddy issues! Until then, I’m not sure I can be around you. 

“So just please leave! Go away and wallow in your shit! Please just get the hell away from me! I want to try to salvage this night and have some fun with my friends. Just go! I’ll find a ride home.”

I looked at her, “But — ”

She screamed at me with fire in her eyes, “Just fucking get away and leave me alone! You’re nothing but a huge pain in the ass! I want to enjoy the rest of this party. You’ve already fucked it up enough! Now GO THE FUCK AWAY!” She turned and joined the partiers that were starting to come up from the beach. 

I sat there stunned by my own stupidity. She was right. She had tried and I was a a pathetic idiot. I got up to leave, glancing over my shoulder, seeing Hanna joining with a group, giving hugs and kisses to everyone. She turned and shot me an icy glance. She turned back to her friends.

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